Remainly - Online Couples Therapy

In the media

Remainly is frequently mentioned in the media, articles and shows.

How to tell the partner that you want couples therapy?

Narum recommends choosing the right time for the conversation - don't do it in the middle of an argument. Try to get a good mood in the conversation; listen and show curiosity. If you could think of professional help, you can wrap it up in a slightly nicer way.
- For example, you can spend an hour in a kind of "gift card". Suggest a luxury weekend, with a spa and then an hour of couples therapy.
It is usually the ladies who initiate couples therapy, and then you may want to present the proposal in a way that does not cause the man to panic completely.
- As mentioned, the "car language" can be useful. Explain that their relationship needs some service as well. Such motivational factors can be a great way to frame such a proposal. And the same goes for the man: Say you want more focus on the relationship, no ladies get angry from hearing it, says Narum.
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Doesn't he want to talk about the future?

A common, painful theme
Andreas Narum is a psychologist and part therapist and runs (editor's note: Remainly's Norwegian version). He says that for many people the future conversation becomes a painful topic in the relationship, and that it is common for one party to become uncertain about the other when they are not as keen on talking about church floors, cabins, dogs and children.

- Yes, it is obvious to think so. Many will see it as a doubt about a common future, and it can be painful. Many couples have this as a recurring bad conversation.

But that is not necessarily the case, he points out. The future talk may simply be unfamiliar. Many people are not used to talking about difficult or serious things, and many couples rarely have such conversations.
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It may take years to repair a relationship after an affair, but it is possible, says psychologist Andreas Løes Narum

- A relationship can often last for many years before seeking help. It is always thought that it can be postponed. But in adultery, it is different. Then you seek help right away. Infidelity is experienced as an atomic bomb in the relationship of the injured party, and then it goes without saying that one cannot wait to seek help.
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Immediate help

Andreas Løes Narum is a psychologist and has many years of experience as a partner therapist and as an expert in various TV programs. And yes, he sees opportunities to reach out with psychological help - via the web, and mobile. In fact, he has invented an online solution, for couples who want help, but who think the doorstep mile of a therapist becomes terribly long.

Couples in acute crisis often need help right away, says psychologist Andreas Løes Narum, who has started the (editor's note: Remainly's Norwegian version) online service.

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Are you sweating by Valentine's Day? You are not alone

But the therapists think you should give the practice a try.
- Everyone I talk to gets pretty sweaty by Valentine's Day.

Psychologist and partner therapist Andreas Løes Narum in (editor's note: Remainlys Norwegian version) is not in doubt. Valentine's Day can be a twisted nut for Norwegian couples.

- Birthdays we can relate to, there is a known script. But Valentine's Day is strangely short, heart-shaped, like Donald. The custom has not become established in Norwegian culture and then we struggle a bit. It's no wonder that many then go "grab the last worn flower brush" trap on their way home to their boyfriend from work. The day can quickly become another opportunity to underperform in the relationship, says Narum.

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Andreas Løes Narum talks with Ida and Arild about what they are probably arguing about

Andreas Løes Narum wonders about the program managers Ida Kjostelsen's and Arild Opheim's personality profiles.

Listen to the full episode at

Setting aside regular time to have sex is one of the most romantic things one can do

For some couples, regular sex can save the relationship in a busy day.

Such a calendar reminder of scheduled sex is not something most people associate with passion, spontaneity and romance. In a busy everyday life, however, it can be difficult to make time for everything, and many couples choose to prioritize sex because they are busy with jobs, hobbies, children and housework. Such downgrading can potentially ruin the relationship, and the expert believes that planning is one of the smartest things you can do.

- Setting aside fixed times to have sex, I think is one of the most romantic things one can do. This is a sign that both want to prioritize the couple relationship, says Andreas Løes Narum, who is a psychologist at (editor's note: Remainlys Norwegian version) and who has many years of experience as a couples therapist.
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About personality tests

Personal mental health tests - should everyone take one to become better acquainted with themselves?

Listen to the full program at Ekko NRK Radio

Can an outgoing person have a good relationship with an introvert?

That you and your partner have two different personalities goes without saying, but sometimes you can be so different that it creates friction and misunderstandings. For example, if one is introverted and the other is extroverted.
- If one wants as little social interaction as possible while the other wants to meet people several times a week, it puts a lasting strain on the relationship. It's a pretty smooth friction in having each one's social agenda. The introvert wants more peace, the extrovert wants more action, says psychologist and partner therapist, Andreas Løes Narum in,

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Are you also a victim of micro-infidelity?

Does your partner turn his cellphone away when you enter the room? Or do you see your partner using flirty emojis with others? This may be a sign of micro-infidelity.

See the video and article at Good Morning Norway, TV2

The experts: This you have to endure by your partner

Many couples are constantly chasing each other, feeling that the distribution of work in the home is skewed. According to the experts, we must endure and accept a part from the partner in order to have a good life together. But where does the border go?
Warns against victim role
Andreas Løes Narum, psychologist and partner therapist at Parweb says that people who neither accept differences nor want to talk about them, often like to paint themselves into a sacrificial corner.
- If you do not talk about the inequalities in a couple relationship, you also find no good way to live with them.

Narum says it is wise to make an effort to become acquainted with one's own and each other's personality traits, and then accept and acknowledge these, rather than annoy them. He recommends couples use the Big Five model as a useful tool to put the difference into words. This model is recognized and widely used to produce individual and prominent personality traits on the five points; outgoing, warmth, control, temperament and openness.
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This is how our memory works

Are you annoyed that your boyfriend doesn't remember things you consider important? There is a possible explanation behind;
According to psychologist and partner therapist Andreas Løs Narum at (editor's note: Remainlys Norwegian version), forgetting the children's ski day is not synonymous with being less engaged, or less happy, in their children than their partner is.
- There is no doubt that it is easier for us to remember what we care about or the things we can associate with an emotion. But when it comes to remembering, for example, when the children have ski days or the family's plans for the weekend, it is probably something else entirely, namely the division of responsibilities in the home, says Narum.
Read the full article from Nettavisen

This is how you make the summer flirt last

As the fall approached, Nora and Vidar knew they had to decide. Should they bet on each other, or was it just a summer flirt? "The preparation is the most important thing in order to make the relationship last," says co-expert Andreas Løes Narum in
Sandy and Danny in "Grease", Baby and Johnny in "Dirty Dancing" or Allie and Noah in "The Notebook".
Many have dreamed up in the romantic films. Girl meets boy. They fall in love during the summer - but then the summer is over and the big question is approaching:
Do they manage to keep life in love?
In the movies, they usually manage it. But in reality it can be more difficult.
The sunlight disappears, it gets darker and colder. The wine glasses he carelessly slung into the basin have become stacks of annoying dishes. The forest walks she promised to join have not been recovered. Do you really fit together?
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Cohabitation expert believes he has found the key to a man's heart

How do you hijack the dream man? An American dating coach claims to have the answer. A Norwegian psychologist is skeptical.
- Everyone likes to be admired. It is linked to the deeper need we have for security and closeness. So admiring admiration for the one you are in love with can certainly be good, but it goes both ways. Women will also be admired; they are not reserved for men, says Løes Narum.
Read the full article from Nettavisen

12 signs of emotional infidelity

It can be difficult to set the boundaries for emotional infidelity. However, the experts list some possible signs of infidelity with the partner.
It is very variable where we set limits when someone has crossed the border and been unfaithful. For some it is a close dance and for others there should be sex involved. For some, a little close friendship becomes too much and for others the boundary goes through a crush. Thus, many people often distinguish between emotional infidelity and physical infidelity. There are some gender differences when it comes to which forms of infidelity are experienced worst. At the group level, women see emotional infidelity as more threatening, while physical infidelity is more threatening to men, Andreas Løes Narum, who is a parapsychologist and psychologist at, tells Nettavisen.
Read the full article from Nettavisen Plus

Which type of couples person are you: confident, direct or evasive?

The relationship you had with your parents in childhood stays with you and affects your adult love life, according to psychological research. Check out what type of relationship you are - and what you should be aware of with regard to your relationship.
The dance of love can behave differently, and while some will recognize themselves in those who come together just after falling in love, others will recognize themselves in the sight of two in love who repeatedly misunderstand each other's attempts at closeness.
According to psychology of attachment theory, there are three different archetypes of attachment, and you belong to one of them. This is stated by psychologist and partner therapist in (editor's note: Remainlys Norwegian version), Andreas Løes Narum.
- The attachment pattern you developed to your parents as a child, you carry with you further and into adulthood, he tells VG.
He says that knowing what attachment style you belong to will give you valuable insights into your love relationships, and the quality of your relationships and emotional experiences.
Read the full article from VG+