Remainly - Online Couples Therapy

How can I get my partner to spend more time with me?

Spending quality time with your partner is essential to having a happy and healthy relationship. However, in the incredibly busy lives we now lead, it can mean that either you or your partner may not commit equal amounts of time to spend with one another.

Approaching the subject can be a challenging task as you don't want accusations to put your partner on the defence. Therefore, it’s key to express how you’re feeling in a positive way to get the best result from the situation.

Think about you

Is your partner not giving you enough of their time, or are you unrealistic with the amount of time they can give you? Before approaching your partner, think about how much time you spend together and whether asking for more time is feasible.

If dedicating more time to spending together is a feasible option, the following tips will help you work together and get your relationship back on track, enjoying the time spent with one another.

Couple overlooking a sea

Talk to your partner

The best way to solve any issues in your relationship is to simply learn how to listen attentively and talk without blaming. Tell your partner how you’re feeling and see how they’re feeling. Find out how you could spend more time together. This could be factors which are out of your control, such as work or family responsibilities.

By talking, you can determine how you could spend more time together, and spend it in a better way, so you’re both happy.

Ditch the distractions

One of the main issues with communication is being flooded by electronics, planning time where you both ditch the devices will allow you to be more engaged with one another. Sit with your partner and plan your relationship time every week. Find times which work for the both of you, whether that’s every evening at a particular time or one day a week.

Find a time that works for both of you. Compromise to find a suitable time. Put your electronics away and give each other your full attention. This makes it possible to reconnect and remember why you fell in love in the first place.

Couple playing Jenga together at home

Take an interest in your partners hobbies

We all have different interests and showing your partner that you’re interested in the things they adore, will show that you’re thinking of them. Ask your partner if you can partake in their hobby the next time. By doing this, you may find a hobby or activity which you enjoy yourself, which is an added bonus to enjoying something your partner likes too. By doing this for your partner, they may take an interest in your hobbies also.

Organise a surprise

If your partner is feeling stressed, organise a surprise for the both of you. This could be something your partner enjoys, which you haven’t tried in the past, allowing your partner to see that you care. Ask your partner when they are available to ensure they’re free but keep the plans a secret.

Try something new together

Experiencing something new is always exciting and allows us to widen our minds. Sit down with your partner and create a bucket list of things you’d both like to do together. Such as a new place you’d like to visit, a course you’d like to try or a sport you’ve yet to try, this will help keep the spark alive and may help the both of you want to spend more time together trying new things.

Couple on a hike

Communication is key in a relationship; online couples therapy can help you and your partner deal with a number of issues which may arise in your relationship. Remainly is an online, video-based, couples advice service led by Andreas Løes Narum, who has many years’ worth of experience in helping couples with their relationship.

Browse the pathways available on our website, which will help you achieve many goals: stop repetitive arguments, solve poor communication issues or helping to build intimacy, here at Remainly we can help you.

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